Graduation day with my daughter (who make me go!)
I don’t give up easily. Stubborn, hardheaded and tenacious, that’s me. It also takes me a while to get the message when I make bad choices and I’ve made a lot. If this sounds like you, read on. Actually, read on anyway.
I graduated high school in Indiana with honors a semester early. Four weeks later I was in my first semester at University. This was a huge mistake. But I was desperate to get out of my hometown. I’d taken enough college credits to start as a sophomore with only 3 hours of freshman math missing. I stayed at another year and then dropped out and moved to Ann Arbor, Michigan with my boyfriend. Ah youth. This was also a huge mistake. The romance became violently toxic.
To safely get out of the house, I took a random accounting class. That teacher saved my life. Not only was he a hysterically funny accounting teacher (rare as hen’s teeth), but he saw that I was in an abusive relationship and helped me get a job in the school’s accounting department.
I eventually got away, found my own place and bought a car. Along the way I earned two Associates Degrees: one in Business and one in Accounting. I loved living in Ann Arbor and I met my first husband there.
We ended up living all over the country but never long in one place. Somewhere in our wanderings, we landed in Indiana again and I decided to finish my BA. I got another year under my belt and with my transfer credits, I was 12 hours short of graduating. Then we moved out of state again. This was…can you guess? If you said a huge mistake congratulations. It was indeed.
The moving took a toll on me and the marriage. When an old college friend offered me a job there we went back to Indiana. Years slipped by and I went to see a counselor at Indiana University, determined to get that last flipping semester under my belt. The good news was they were willing to accept my credits and transfers from long ago. The bad news was they wanted 21 hours to graduate, not 12. I took one in-person class at a time at night for years. I finally graduated with a BA (with distinction!) in Liberal Studies. Oldest in my class. Yay! During that time, I had a daughter, got divorced and remarried.
It took me 40+ years to get my degree. I like to joke that I couldn’t decide on a major, but the truth is I was ashamed and scared I wasn’t smart enough to do it. My whole family had degrees so what was wrong with me? Turns out, nothing. The corporate world I was in repeatedly alluded to my inferiority, adding to my own feelings of doubt, shame, and general icky-ness. It was hell but some sad, sick part of me felt maybe they were right. I have since remedied those feelings.
The moral of this story for me was not to give up on what you need to feel whole. It won’t go like you planned and it may take a while, but it’s worth your time and money to ease what gnaws inside you. Leave no regrets. That’s the golden lesson I learned. Surprisingly, you and your opinion of you are what counts in the end. If your heart and soul need it, get out there and get started. No matter how long it takes. Be stubborn, hardheaded and tenacious.
If you find yourself at a loss on how to get started on moving into the life you’ve always wanted, let’s talk. Work With Me
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